She Don't Think Straight

your dreams are like a pile of red string in your head and sometimes you want so badly for them to get tangled up with someone elses; but they keep cutting the feeble attempts you've made to get them intertwined and how someone else is tugging at them and you're only allowing them to because they are there and giving you the sick attention you've been searching for, so you keep letting them touch you like that and you keep whispering those lies because you know exactly what they want to hear, and then suddenly they're not assholes anymore. you are, and you keep tying those fake knots between the two of your heartstrings because you know you can, and you can tell that they're falling hard but you simply watch them lose their grip on their understanding of what it is they really want, so you contemplate cutting the strings that holds them to you, and not the other way around, all because you accidentally saw the frayed ends of the severed knots lingering in the hair of the person you really want, and you realize that you've become everything that you hate and exactly what you've always wanted to be at the same time.